Another Rough Month

It has been yet another rough month so far. My grandfather passed away three days after my last post. I am glad he didn't suffer for an extended period of time, but it is still difficult to lose someone you love and it's a little hard to wrap your head around when it happens quickly. I had more of a part to play in the days afterwards than I've had in the aftermath of the deaths of other friends and family, and I have to say it is a whole new experience to have to take part in tying up the loose ends of someone's life and the arrangements that have to be made to finalize (for lack of a better word) their time on Earth instead of having to contend solely with thoughts and grief. Specifically, I was put in charge of proof reading the obituary, doing the "write up" for the church bulletin to be used at his funeral, reading a passage from the Bible at the funeral, helping to fill out the necessary financial paperwork for my grandmother, and writing the note of thanks to go in the newspaper. It was difficult, it was stressful, and it also gave me something to focus on to get through this time and feel useful.

I spent the weekend in St. John's apartment hunting again. I called/emailed about upwards of thirty apartments and ended up viewing only six. Of those six, two were what I would consider "dives," three were decent, and one was absolutely gorgeous. Although my heart was set on the "gorgeous" spot, I decided on one of the "decent" places (which was cheaper and therefore more practical), and the landlady said she would get back to me in a couple of days. I am keeping my fingers crossed and hoping it pans out...

Of course, I still don't have a job either which is becoming somewhat frustrating. I am, however, lucky enough to have awesome parents who (although it is incredibly embarrassing to have to ask for at this age) are willing to back me up until I can stand on my own two feet again. There are those who are of the opinion that it is stupid of me to look for a place to live before I have a job to pay for it, but I happen to think that once I am in town things will fall into place. I will have more time to look for employment and I will be in there already when it comes time to start...and as an added bonus I will have my own space once more and feel somewhat like an adult again. Besides, according to everyone I've talked to, apartments are scarce these days and the competition for them is fierce. Hence, wouldn't it make sense to focus my efforts there for the time being to make sure I have a place to live before everything is scooped up by the new group of students moving in for the fall semseter at MUN?

Anyway, I will stop babbling and trying to rationalize. I have a touch of cabin fever again today and it is only Monday yet so that is not a good sign...but the wind in the trees and the fresh air coming through my bedroom window sure are nice...